Southern Fried Diva’s Virgin Post

In a moment of weakness, this blog virgin agreed to join with a group of Golden Heart® finalists and, gulp, blog.

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Pretend you’re at the Ed Sullivan Theater and Dave Letterman is giving his top ten. Hmm. Make that three. Drum roll please.

Search #3 WILL IT KILL ME?

pamela-coffee (1)At the butt crack of dawn, I staggered into the kitchen and pressed my freshly manicured nail to the brew button of my coffee machine. I steamed milk for café au lait and added it to my cup of Community dark roast coffee.

Only partially caffeinated, I shook bran flakes jazzed up with raisins into bowl and added milk. As I swallowed my first vitamin-fortified bite, I noticed an army of tiny black specks swim for the safety to the rim of my cereal bowl. Those were the lucky ones. An untold number had been consumed in my first bite.

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Some of you girly-girls are gagging right now and I understand. I’m pretty darned girly, but it occurred to me those were not the first bugs or the last I’d eat.

IMG_0798I come from a long line of adventurous eaters. When I was about six, Pop brought home a box of chocolate covered ants. He popped a few in his mouth and handed me the box. Tasted like chocolate to me, and what kid passes up chocolate? Another time, we tried fried grasshoppers, which tasted a lot like the crispy tail of a small fried white perch. Food at my house was an adventure…still is. Recently, I visited the Insectarium with the next generation of adventurous eaters. The cricket chocolate chip cookies were darn right tasty.

And there was a time back in my reckless teen years when I loved nothing better than to ride on the back of a motorcycle with my arms wrapped around a bad boy’s waist and the wind whipping through my hair. We’d ride into the setting sun, and if I leaned in to whisper (okay yell) into his ear, my mouth became a likely target for a bug at seventy MPH. Let’s just say, I ate a few bugs during those days and lived to tell it.

Most of you may be thinking you’d never eat a bug.

But you probably have and haven’t eaten your last.

There’s an old story, which I couldn’t verify, that the original reason ketchup had a collar label was to hide the insects that floated to the top of the bottle back in the days before the FDA. See the FDA Defect Level Handbook (Commodities and Defect Action Levels) for acceptable levels today. Believe me. You’ve eaten a bug.

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And according to some, insects may feed the world one day. Check out Daniella Martin, author of Edible: An

Adventure into the World of Eating Insects and the last Great Hope to Save the Planet.

After my World Wide Web rabbit hole search (308,000 results in 0.35 seconds), I discovered I’d consumed a grain beetle.

Totally edible.

Search # 2 TWITTER ETIQUETTE

Being a Southern born girl and new to twitter, I figured I’d need good manners to play in the twitter-sphere. A quick search netted 47,800,000 results in 0.29 seconds. Looks like everyone wants to be polite on Twitter.

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My top pick was Twitter Etiquette for Beginners. If you want to see how I’m doing, follow me on Twitter.

Search # 1 HOW TO WRITE A BLOG POST

537,000,000 results in 0.41 seconds. My top choice was How to Write An Awesome Blog in Five Steps.

How’d I do for my first real blog post? Be gentle…

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Please visit the websites of my Golden Heart® sisters and blogging pros to find out where their last three searches took them in the wilds of the Internet. 

Carol PostKay HudsonJean WillettPriscilla KissingerWendy LaCapra

Kat CantrellKristen EthridgeNatalie Meg EvansSharon Wray

Also this month, we’re celebrating Firebird sister Kristen Ethridge’s release of her new book, The Doctor’s Unexpected Family. Here’s the blurb:

51hf-c0J-HL._SX311_BO1204203200_1Dr. Pete Shipley is on a mission to save lives and he’s ready to move to another corner of the world where his skills are needed. City Councilwoman Angela Ruiz is a single parent fighting to save her hometown after Hurricane Hope tears through Port Provident, leaving destruction across the community she has sworn to serve. Together, they team up to found The Grace Space, a Christian-based community gathering spot in the heart of Angela’s district, where residents can get food, household goods, and basic medical care while Port Provident rebuilds after the storm.When Pete’s appointment to an international medical mission comes, will the doctor follow his lifelong dream and leave Port Provident, The Grace Space, and Angela and her daughter—or will he stay with the family he didn’t expect to love and realize he can change the world without leaving home?Hurricane Hope: One storm changes Port Provident forever…and for good.
Check it out on Amazon. It’s only $2.99!

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Natalie Meg Evan’s second book The Milliner’s Secret is a heart-wrenching love story set in wartime Paris.

London,1937. A talented young woman travels to Paris with a stranger. The promise of an exciting career as a milliner beckons, but she is about to fall in love with the enemy…

Londoner Cora Masson has reinvented herself as Coralie de Lirac, fabricating an aristocratic background to launch herself as a fashionable milliner. When the Nazis invade, the influence of a high-ranking lover, Dietrich, saves her business. But while Coralie retains her position as designer to a style-hungry elite, Paris is approaching its darkest hour.

Faced with the cruel reality of war and love, Coralie must make a difficult choice – protect herself or find the courage to fight for her friends, her freedom and everything she believes in.

COMING SOON

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13 thoughts on “Southern Fried Diva’s Virgin Post

  1. I laughed so hard at this, Pamela! Especially the part of you being on the back of a BB’s motorcycle chugging down bugs. LOL.
    And I love your new website. It’s gorgeous! 🙂

    Like

    • Thanks, Sharon. It took me all this time to get your comment out of approval limbo. 😉 I guess I’ll get the hang of this. Yep. Bugs and I go way back…I’m glad my newbie blog gave you a laugh.

      Like

  2. Oh girl, I am totally checking out those Twitter etiquette links. Thanks for sharing them!

    Let me say, I was one of those girly girls gagging at the thought of your bug-infused breakfast :-O But like Sharon, I smiled at the image of you on the back of a motorcycle having a great time– regardless of the bug eating possibilities.

    I love your pic at the top of the blog page– your eyes are absolutely gorgeous, you southern fried diva you!! Super site!

    Like

  3. I have to admit, Pamela, I would have never been half as calm as you seemed to be after seeing bugs floating in your coffee cup! But alas, I too have inhaled my share of yucky bugs and lived to tell…although I was probably a lot more vocal about it. :0) Nice webpage BTW!

    Like

  4. Your first blog was awesome, Pamela! You did it like a pro! I loved your bug story. Years ago, I had made some bean soup with dried beans, and my daughter found half a beetle in hers. (We’re not sure what happened to the other half.) She hasn’t touched bean soup since.

    Like

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